...

There is a line from Verlaine ,I'll never now recall,

There is a street nearby from which my footsteps are barred,

There is a mirror that has looked its last on my face,

There is a door I have closed for the final time.

Amongst the books in my library

There are some I will never open again.

- Except from Jorges Luis Borges 's poem

...

शमा की लौ ने कुछ ऐसा समां बाँधा,
के मेरी तन्हाई से डर के ,
मेरे साए ने उस शाम,
ख़ुद ही मेरा दामन थामा/

Faith.

Sunday morning.Deep BLUE mood.’A walk to remember.’


What started out as a movie to watch cos one was feeling lonely turned out to be something more than just a time killer.
Movies will be movies but sometimes they tend to touch just the right chord.
More about faith than love ,the movie was a beautiful example of what a little belief in life and in people in general can do.
One has been having questions - lots of them.
Whatever happens …is it because one deserves it ? Can one handle things alone ?
Why is everything not a choice ?
A simple fight , a big dilemma - thousands of unanswered questions.
What is it that is needed ?
Courage,Confidence,Capability ?
At the end of it ,maybe,just maybe, it boils down to having Faith.
Anger,confusion,despair,injustice – maybe all one’s got to do is believe.
Have faith in the conviction that good begets good.That you can imagine and hope and dream and that very soon you’ll get it all.
Maybe today,maybe tomorrow ,maybe after you’ve learnt your lesson.
Maybe when you are really ready for it.


Sunday evening.Light blue mood.Faith ?A little less shaky.

An August realization.

There at the helm of the house boat, effectively cutting out the rest of the world - with only me, the ripples on the water, the sky and the steady lull of the boat- I was completely at peace.
At peace with me, at peace with my inner demons and at peace with the various complexities life continues to dole out.

It was the most comforting sight, the life in the water co-existing with the tranquil expanses of the skies above.
Energy and serenity together at once, exactly like the state of mind one was in.
So many thoughts in the head, the rights ,the wrongs .
The black ,the white and especially those greys- the ones maxing out my emotional strength.

I had a boatful of friends to give me company, yet over the din, I could distinctly hear the heart, a steady beat, helping me reaffirm what I had just realized
- Tranquility can only be appreciated by its absence.

There I was, looking till where my sight went,
looking where the sea and the sky met and the only thing I could think was
‘Only my Creator can judge me ’.

जाने क्यों...

अक्सर ऐसा लगता है ,
कुछ बदल सा गया है/
जैसा वोह पहले था,
वैसा रह ना गया है/

उस मुस्कान में कोई तो कमी है,
उस नज़र में कुछ तो अलग है,
कुछ कदम आगे बढ़कर जैसे
ठिठक सा गया है/

बीते हुए कल कल का दर्द है उसे?
या आने वाले कल का डर ?
जाने किस कशमकश में,
वोह इस pal को खो रहा है/